I love that a woman can love and not have to be hurt for it

I know a woman is capable of so much. And she needs another woman to teach her how to do that.

I was with someone who treated me very unkindly, and even though he hadn't been in love with me for years, he kept me under the illusion that I was someone else to him, even though he gave me nothing tender or loving.

He only knew how to tell me I was a wonderful wife and brag about me to his friends. However, when it came to a real confrontation, when my opinion differed from his, he became aggressive and very unpleasant.

He gave me nothing but the feeling that something was wrong with me and that there was no point in telling me honestly what was going on inside him. He didn't reciprocate my honesty; he chose to treat me with accusations.

And he didn't give me any sense of safety that I could be who I was. He didn't want to share joy with me, only provoked arguments. And he wouldn't let me finish my sentence, because he already had a ready-made solution for fixing me.

I know this wasn't clear to me for many years. I thought this was love, and if I changed enough, he would notice and change too. But he only saw what he wanted to see, and there was no room in that vision for what was important to me.

I know I want to change something
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